Top Ten Things To Do at IKEA

10. Stop the car for 3 seconds upon arrival to take the first "IKEA" picture, despite the symphony of honking cars behind.
9. Pick up an oompa-loompa size No.2 pencil and shopping list with map.
8. Try to figure out said map. No easy task.
7. Sit on every couch in the living room section. Red and yellow, black and white; they're all precious in my sight.
6. Open every drawer, and (for that matter) any openable spaces, i.e. refrigerator
5. Discover the ironing board contained in a small drawer. You heard me right, folks. An ironing board. IN a small cabinet drawer.
4. Drink Lingonberry juice and a good cheap meal after working up an appetite from doing #10 through 5.
3. Touch every whisk, spoon, peeler, cup, spatula and other miscellaneous kitchen item in the marketplace.
2. Get lost somewhere between lighting and furniture. Which way's out? Duh... Follow the arrows!
1. Use self check out, ignore the 50cent hot dogs, and say "Vi ses snart!" (see you soon, in Swedish)

Ikea, home of swedish meatballs, unbeknownst berries, cheap kitchen gadgets, and attractive furniture. I will miss you.

Until we meet again, dear friend. 'Til we meet again...